


Marco In The Bathroom

by phanslovechild



Category: Be More Chill - Iconis/Tracz, Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: A song about being a loser, Alternate Universe - High School, Angst, Based on Be More Chill, Based on Michael In The Bathroom, Be More Chill - Freeform, Best Friends, I mean you can kinda figure out who's Jeremy and who's Michael but, Jean is Jeremy, Jean kirschtein - Freeform, Marco Bodt - Freeform, Marco doesn't sing sadly, Marco is Michael, One Shot, Sadness, Short One Shot, Song: Michael in the Bathroom, Songfic, Teen Angst, this is garbage
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-10
Updated: 2017-07-10
Packaged: 2018-11-30 07:49:44
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,111
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11459211
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/phanslovechild/pseuds/phanslovechild
Summary: Marco get's ditched at a party, and instead of facing things head on... He hides in the bathroom.





	Marco In The Bathroom

**Author's Note:**

> Alright so. This is a one shot, as you can probably tell. I was trying to get back into the swing of writing, motivate myself, and since I've been enjoying Be More Chill (specifically this song off the album) HERE WE HAVE WHATEVER THIS IS. 
> 
> This is weird for me, because anyone who follows me KNOWS how much I love and adore JeanMarco. But we all make sacrifices for the sake of clever crossovers. You're welcome. 
> 
> I suggest you listen to the song.  
> (I spent about 10 years trying to get this link to work. I don't know what's wrong with it. Honestly it'd be faster to just throw the title into YouTube pals.)   
> It might help make this more awesome. 
> 
> Comment your thoughts? Enjoy.

“Get out of my way,” there was a pause in Jean’s speech before he uttered the words I knew shattered our friendship into a million pieces. “You loser.”

I held back tears, feeling the crushing weight of heartbreak in my chest. Kind of embarrassing how I showed up to this party with a best friend and somehow would end up leaving without one. But I didn’t stop him. Instead, I swallowed all my pride and moved to the side allowing Jean to make his way out, slamming the door behind him.

I took a few deeps breaths before turning to look in the mirror. My face was red from holding back tears and it burned slightly as one made a track down my freckled cheek. Wiping it away quickly I shook my head, trying to clear it. That’s when I remembered I did have one person to talk to.

Pulling out my phone I opened G-Mail and started to type.  
  
**_Dear Dr.Zoe,_ **

**_I am hanging in the bathroom at the biggest party of the fall. I could stay right here, or disappear, and nobody would even notice at all._ **

Taking a few more deep breaths I moved across the slightly small bathroom, taking a seat on the toilet. This was lame, and I knew it, but honestly, I’d lost most of my dignity already that night when my best friend- who was also my only friend, by the way- walked out on me.

**_I’m a creeper in a bathroom cause my buddy kinda left me alone. But I'd rather fake pee then stand awkwardly or pretend to check a text on my phone. Everything felt fine when I was half of a pair. And through no fault of mine, there's no other half there. Now I’m just Marco in the bathroom. Marco in the bathroom… at a party. I forget how long it’s been._ **

I hear a shout, someone asking if they come in the restroom as they jiggle the door handle stupidly.

“No, sorry, you… Um… Can’t. It’s occupied!” I manage, probably sounding way too choked up if I was trying to be sneaky. In all honesty though whoever was there is probably too drunk to care anyway, and with a laugh, I can hear their uneven footsteps clamber away.

Even though they’re gone though I still can’t quite silence my anxiety, so I stand up and clamber into the tub as I continue to type out my e-mail.

**_I’m waiting it out ‘till it’s time to leave and picking at grout as I softly grieve. I’m just... Marco who they don’t know, Marco flying solo, Marco in the bathroom by himself. All by himself…_ **

I sigh, looking over the words I’ve already managed. I’m starting to feel kind of stupid now emailing my therapist from a bathtub, while on the other side of the bathroom door everyone else is partying. But I guess I’d already come into agreement with myself, among others, that I’m a huge loser. Guess this is just filling in the stereotype.  

**_I am hiding but he’s out there just ignoring all our history. Memories get erased and I’ll get replaced with a newer cooler version of me. I can hear a drunk girl sing along to Whitney through the door._ **

I silently mouth the words of the song, recognizing it as ‘I Wanna Dance With Somebody’. Even I can’t blame myself, it’s a good song.

**_And my feelings sink ‘cause it makes me think now there's no one to make fun of drunk girls with anymore. Now it’s just Marco in the bathroom… Marco in the bathroom at a party. I half regret the beers._ **

I lightly bang the side of my head against the wall of the bath, trying fruitlessly to knock away any of the tears still threatening my eyes. I fail… To no surprise of my own.  

**_Marco in the bathroom, at a party, as I choke back the tears. I’ll wait as long as long as I need ‘till my face is dry, or I’ll just blame it on weed, or something in my eye._ **

I stand angrily, mumbling to myself and I trip my way through tears towards the sink, the words echoing in my head.

‘Marco who they don’t know, Marco flying solo, Marco in the bathroom by himself. Marco in the bathroom, Marco in the bathrooms’ God, how can I make it stop?!

I jump as I hear a few knocks at the door, panic flooding my senses. I start to run the water and try to make it sound like I’m doing something in here, giving me a few seconds to figure out my game plan.

_Knock. Knock. Knock. Knock._

“Oh hell yeah, I’ll be out soon!”

_Knock. Knock. Knock. Knock._

**_It sucks he left me here alone._ **

_Knock. Knock. Knock. Knock._

**_I’m in this teenage battle zone._ **

_Clang! Clang! Clang! Clang!_

**_I feel the pressure blowing up._ **

_Bang! Bang! Bang! Bang!_

**_My big mistake was showing up._ **

I throw some water in my face, and I tell myself I’m in a much better place. My head is cleared. So I reach over to open up the door, but I don’t hear the knocking anymore. So instead, my hand slowly pulls away and to my chest. I can already feel my head clouding up again.

**_And I can’t help but yearn for a different time. Then I look in the mirror, and the present is clearer… There’s no denying I’M JUST-_ **

Hot tears, but I cover my mouth to keep from crying out. The least I can do for myself is keep my sobbing quiet. I know I’m sad, that I’m angry, but I don’t want Jean to think he’s won this. What does it matter? I’m not sure. He’s probably out there enjoying the party anyway.

**_At a party. Is there a sadder sight? Then Marco in the bathroom, at a party? This is a heinous night. I wish I stayed at home in bed watching cable porn or wish I offed myself instead… Wish I was never born. I’m just Marco… Who’s a loner so “he must be a stoner”! Rides a PT Cruiser, “God he’s such a loser”! Marco flying solo, who they think that they know, Marco in the bathroom BY HIMSELF!_ **

The tears are free flowing by now, hands shaking as I type the last line of the email.

**_All they know about me is my name._ **

Then I hit delete. I erase it all. I open up Facebook (Yes, I even still use that. What a loser, right?) and make a new status.

_Awesome party! I’m so glad I came :)_


End file.
